Write for twenty minutes,  was the task for today. Try to put on paper (or via my cellphone on cyberspace) a stream of consciousness – I think that was the term, and I can’t look it up so as not to break my train of thought. So I have been waiting this whole day for that holy moment when I would feel ready to let my thoughts go to wherever they want to go. It didn’t come. Finally,  I am just starting to write,  when I have twenty minutes of time to do it.
While writing I am not craving an audience. I don’t even know why my journal doesn’t satisfy me any more. Since the coming of the Internet it seems a waste to me to write my feelings in a notebook. When writing I feel like I am creating something,  and I like that. The result is often not what I wanted it to be, and if it was a drawing it would probably end up in a drawer. As it is a blog it ends up in my drafts. A famous poetess, I think she was Dutch, said something like: if you wrote seven words you should banish six. Okay,  she was a poet. Once I aspired to be a poet, but I suspect that I grew out of it. I haven’t written poetry for ages. Anyway,  that is why I write. I care about the content,  obviously,  and I would like to write Great and Impressive Words and Thoughts. But it often seems to me that I am a small sort of writer. Like a person who likes to paint, and enjoys the yellow because it is such beautiful yellow, but the painting never quite looks good enough. And about that audience… I welcome it. But it’s not the reason I write.


3 thoughts on “Write

  1. I enjoyed reading your post. If you read my post, you’ll see I express my own lack confidence in my writing as well as my art. I am going to continue to read more and see if this comes out in any other blog. I think it is really scary to lay bare your soul to people either in words or images and then get negative feedback or even feel that you are not deserving of positive comments.

      • Yes, I found the pace too fast. I like to think about the topic and as an artist I tend to visualize it as well. I have decided to take my time and choose the topics that interest me and go with them at my own pace and time.

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